Monday, October 15, 2012

in which there are pictures, mostly of cats and my hair.

Greetings, friends on the internet.
I apologize for the space between updates. Here's a nice picture for you:

Aw, look at africa, bein' all pretty. 

Anyways, this is supposed to be the part where I'm all like, guysss, I'm just so busssyyyy I haven't had timeeee, but let's not kidd ourselves, I'm just lazy as crap. But today I realized I was officially caught up on ANTM (which is not really all that fun to watch alone and sober, fyi) and was doing pushups for fun. FOR FUN. The thought process behind this being that...I have never been able to do any great amount of pushups in a row? I guess?

Basically, I've had a lot of ill-used free time. I actually formally interviewed for my job last week, which was...catastrophic. At one point I said I would prefer not to eat bugs. To be clear, no one had even remotely mentioned bugs until this time. I am horrible at interviews. I'm not really worried, though, as they're kind of desperate for people and I have the added benefit of being fluent in English. Sometimes you have to move to Africa in order for the job market to be in your favor.

Other than that I've done the minimal amount of schoolwork necessary, swam in the ocean, wandered aimlessly, learned how to make swiss chocolate mousse, improved my french vocabulary by maybe two and a half words, and filed paperwork to the embassy. Oh, and apparently I do push ups now. So that's fun.

Here are some things, in no particular order:

1) I have procured another cat. And by that I technically mean that my mother has procured a cat, but in reality all cats I meet become mine.

Cats love: having their tummies scratched and sleeping on my boobs. I can explain neither of these things. 
The cat's name is pickles (I did not name this cat) and it's basically the most bedraggled looking kitten of all times (I did not pick this cat) and she loves me best (because this cat recognizes that I am, in fact, patron saint of the cats.)
In other cat related news, my other cat (who was not technically my cat) was diagnosed with...kitty aids? Or something to that extent? And was put down. So that was a bummer for a good three hours or so. 

2) FABRIC IS SO CHEAP HERE IT IS THE MOST GLORIOUS THING OF MY LIFE. If I could figure out how to make my iphone talk to my computer, I'd show you the endless bolts of (quality!) brocade for TWO DOLLARS A YARD, but frankly that's just too much work for one picture. Suffice it to say, I will be sewing all the things here. I'm also looking forward to when I return to fashion school after next year's Christmas break with suitcases filled with fabric. I'll be the envy of all the other pretentious designers. 

3) I will probably not be fabulously beautiful when I leave Senegal.  Which is a crying shame, because my original plan while here was to lose twenty pounds, grow long and fabulous beach hair, and be just tan enough to raise the "maybe she's born with it/ maybe it's maybelline?" question.  Instead I will probably look like Tom Hanks in Castaway. 

Wilson is my life now.

Seriously, my skin is already that color. And I'm a giant skin cancer-phobe, since I'm destined to get it anyway, meaning I wear SPF 70 literally all the time. I wear sunscreen to bed. This is not an exaggeration. And I'm still browning like a baked potato. The only explanation for this is we must be next door neighbors with the sun. Or something. I don't understand. 

Since being here I have also lost fifteen pounds. To refresh your memories, I have been here for two weeks.  I am not thrilled about this. For one, that's way too little time to lose fifteen pounds. And two, I've come to think of myself as a fairly hot fat person. If I were to continue to lose fifteen pounds every two weeks, I would look like Christian Bale in that one movie by the time I left. 

I like to think of this as Christian Bale's "Hater gonna hate" pose. I should really watch the Machinist. 
Also if you live somewhere where you can't get your haircut, it will not grow out to look like a mermaid, it will grow out to look like the lost backstreet boy.

If I knew any Backstreet Boy lyrics, this is where I would put them. 
Basically, I have an abundance of white people problems and I like to complain. That's really where I'm going with this.

4) Moving back in with your parents is really weird. And I really miss eating cheesecake scantily clad. That about sums up my feelings. 

So, friends of the internet, is anybody else following ANTM? Because I really want to drink cocktails and talk about my feelings on Victoria.

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I'm a sucker for kittens and fancy dresses.